How i currently feel

Current song playing: Digital Love by Daft Punk (they're my favorite techno/deephouse artist btw!)

Current Quote of the day: "I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." ---Mother Teresa

(just a lil background info, this is an excerpt from Daft Punk's movie called Interstellar 5555. It was an animated movie that they made that shows a story this group in outer space and something bad happens to their band members, and the story gets really sci fi. there is now talking and it is pretty much a musical of their cd with aided animation. kind of like a modern day Gorillaz kinda thing. i reccoment u watch the movie. u can find it on youtube. the whole thing. i havent' seen the movie since Jr. High. it's kinda nostalgic to see this clip again. haha i really like this vid. clip, esp. where he daydreams about the girl and they're in the medow and stuff. i kinda do wut that guy does, except without hte girly meadow shit. rofl.)


"Digital Love"

Last night I had a dream about you
In this dream I'm dancing right beside you
And it looked like everyone was having fun
the kind of feeling I've waited so long
Don't stop come a little closer
As we jam the rythm gets stronger
There's nothing wrong with just a little little fun
We were dancing all night long
The time is right to put my arms around you
You're feeling right You wrap your arms around too
But suddenly I feel the shining sun Before I knew it this dream was all gone

Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
I wish this dream comes true
Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
We'll make this dream come true

Why don't you play the game ?
Why don't you play the game ?




It's all a balancing act in my opinion. and i honestly don't know wut to do...

There's the girl that i constantly think about, and considered (note the past tense) or pursuing. i am not sure if i should or not. (she is ridiculously beautiful... but is there really more to her than just physcial attraction?)

There is my friends that i have tried really hard to grow closer with and want to pursue closer relationships with those friends. am i really willing to trade my efforts for my friends for a woman?

And there is/are the girl(s) that might have a crush on me. (this is purely speculation and just my guess. i have no idea if i am right at all. i could be totally wrong and bending things outta shape)

Now what do i do? let's not joke ourselves, women take up much effort, time and money. lol. do i really have that rite now. can i afford that rite now? This girl i have in mind doens't seem like a longterm relationship... but why do i still think about her?

i really wanted and think im leaning more towards growing closer with a small groups of friends. i really wanted to focus on that for the time being and not worry about the time, and effort, and money spent on girls. but why is it that i still constnatly think of that one girl? why? why? lol why is that? iono man. something tells me that i shouldn't pursue her... and i can keep my options open with a select few, but what do i really wanna do? More importantly...what does God want me to do?

i feel like i really sux at hearing God's will for me. rite now, i think i shud just concentrate on some really good friendships, i feel like it'll take me a long way. cuz if i try to go for one girl... i might end up slipping all the time and effort i've been working so hard to open up and earn new friendships and ppl.'s trusts. etc.

but then again... i still kinda don't know wut to do. *sigh* lol.

I think im starting to learn how to balance my life tho. and that's something new and good for me. im tryin to balance (or learn how to balance) my social, school, and family, and religious time. I feel like im getting better at it. What God has in store for me, i hav no idea. but yes...i'll be patient, and wait. maybe i shud just keep things the way they are, keepin the status quo son. I like where i am now and the direction im facing in life. why not go with the flow eh?

all in all... :-D Life is good. Seize the day people!

end time: 12:16